I’m Going to KILL that Mom of mine!

Hello, cats. I know that I said that I’d post about my friends in the neighborhood. However, my Mom did such a horrible thing to me yesterday that I just had to post about it!

Yesterday, I knew the day was not going to be good when I heard a knock on the door. I do not like strangers, so I took evasive action by hiding under the bed. The male human that was knocking said he was here to set up our new phone and Internet service. However, I noticed that he was checking out my Mom more than the phones or computer that he was supposed to set up. So, I rustled under the bed just to let him know that I was there, and that if he even touched my Mom, I’d claw his eyes out. He chuckled and said, “Oh, my cat hides too.” Mom smiled at him and said, “Oh, then you know what it’s like.” I think that man just said that to get my Mom interested in him. I’ll bet he doesn’t even have a cat!

Next, my Mom did something that shocked me. After saying, “I’ve got to go and do the laundry. I’ll be right back,” she walked out of the door, and left me alone in the house with a stranger!  I was terrified because that man could have been a psycho cat killer in a phone guy uniform. So, I stayed under the bed while plotting ways that I would claw his eyes out if he tried to hurt me.

Thankfully, that didn’t happen. However, I am furious about this—especially since my Mom kept leaving me alone with that man so that she could “finish her laundry.” I mean, what is more important to her—her clothes or her cat? After two hours of horror, that man finally left. That gave me plenty of time to figure out ways to punish her. Here are just a few of the things that I’ve done to her so far:

  • I left a nasty surprise for her in front of my litter box. Sadly, she didn’t step in it.
  • I threw a ball at her at 5:00 A.M hoping to leave a bruise. She thought I was playing with her. I wasn’t.
  • I am tearing up the closet right now. She just yelled at me, so I’ll stop—for now.

I have other things that I’m planning to do to her, like clawing up her clothes when she goes to sleep tonight. Right now, though, I’m going to be very nice to her so that she doesn’t know what I’m up to. I’ll be checking this blog after she goes to sleep, so if any of you cats have ideas about other ways that I can punish her please post. Thanks!

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