I’m Back!

Hi cats. I can’t believe it’s been over a month since I’ve posted! I could give you a lot of excuses but the truth is that I was feeling discouraged. Mom said that most of the visitors to our site are spammers and bots. So, I thought, Why even bother posting then?

However, I missed blogging about what’s going on with that crazy Mom of mine, and everything that’s going on with my secret friends in our neighborhood. That made me decide to keep on posting even if no one is reading my blog. And, Simone reminded me that a thousand cats who are good at covering their tracks could be reading this blog right now.

So, I’m back! I’m going for now, but I will tell you about what’s been going on in my neighborhood in my next post. Until then, I hope that all is well with you, cats!

The Medicine Wars—Conclusion

Hello, cats.  I am sorry that I didn’t post on Tuesday like I promised to.  I could give you all kinds of excuses, but the truth is that I’m embarrassed because I never got to claw up my Mom’s hands.

This is what happened.  After my Mom fell asleep, I was running around the apartment and pouncing on my toys to prepare for what I called “the clawing that would end this medicine torture forever.”  Suddenly, I heard a voice I hadn’t heard for a while say, “Hsssssssssssst.  Grace, what are you doing in there?”

After I ran to the window, I was happy to see that it was Bruno’s voice I heard.  Now, in case you are new to my blog, Bruno is the cat who beat up the meanest cat in the neighborhood, Clawzilla.  When he did that, we found out that Bruno knows how to do what I can only call, “Katate.”  I was so happy to see him, cats.  I figured that with his help, I could really get my Mom.  So, I told him about what I was planning to do.  Then, I asked him if he could teach me some katate moves that would make my Mom stop giving me medicine—forever.

I was shocked when Bruno gave me a dirty look.  Then he said, “Grace, you are an ungrateful brat cat.  All that your Mom is doing is treating the infection behind your ear—”

“How dare you call me a brat cat?  She is torturing me, and I’m going to defend myself!” I screamed.

Bruno glared at me in a way that made my fur stand up.  Then he growled, “Fine, Grace.  Go claw up your Mom.  Then, you’ll be back out on the streets.  I hope you like it out here!”  Then, he stalked away.

I was furious with that cat.  So, I decided to ignore him, and I ran over to the bed to pounce on my Mom’s hand.  As I was about to do that, a strong Voice said, “No

I knew that Voice.  But I wanted to do what I wanted to do.  So I pounced at my Mom’s hand, with claws extended.  Then, it was like there was an invisible wall between me and my Mom!  Every time I tried to get her, I ended up bouncing onto the floor beside our bed.  Finally, I gave up and said, “OK, God, I won’t get her tonight.  But could you please make her stop shoving that awful medicine down my throat?”

I thought I heard him say, “Wait” After that, I went to sleep.

I’m glad that I waited cats.  The next day, my Mom called the veterinarian because she felt that I’d “gone through enough torture with this medicine.”  I jumped for joy when I heard him say that if I was all better, she could stop giving it to me.  My Mom is cautious so she gave me two more doses of the horrid pink stuff.  Then she said, “Grace, there will be no more medicine.”  I was very happy to hear that.  And, she has kept her word so far.

However, she is still putting medicine on her hands.  Before I was stopped from clawing her, I managed to leave a few marks on her hands.  Here are two pictures of them:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’m glad that this is over with, and I know I can’t attack her in her sleep. However, these marks show that in a battle between a human and a cat—-the cat always wins.  Type to you later!

Grace the Sneaky Clawer

The Medicine Wars 2.5—The Nightmare Continues

Hi cats.  I am typing this post while hiding under the bed from that woman.  Cats, would you believe that she is still shoving medicine down my throat?  I mean, it has been almost ten days now.  So, any “infection” I had should be killed. I’ve concluded that she is doing this to torture me.

Well cats, I am not taking this lying down.  She has to go to sleep soon.  After she does that, I plan on clawing her hands up so that she won’t ever be able to give me medicine again.  I will tell you how that goes tomorrow.  I have to go now, because I need to plan my attack. Type to you soon!

The Medicine Wars: Part Two

Hello cats. This is the post that I promised you that will tell you more about what that evil woman is doing to me.   I am about to get very graphic, so if you are a kitten who is less than six months old, please don’t read any further.  What I’m about to post will give you nightmares.

What that woman has been doing to me is taking a large medicine syringe that is bigger than my face, forcing my mouth open, and then squirting vile-tasting medicine down my throat.  She tells me this will prevent me from getting a really bad infection.  I think she’s doing this to torture me.

I have evaded her many times, but she has become as sneaky as a cat!  So, she has managed to capture me fourteen times to do this to me.  However, I am not without defenses, so here are a just three of the things that I’ve done to her in revenge for what she’d doing to me:

  1. I scratched her arm while pretending to stretch.
  2. I tied her favorite jewelry into a knot like this

 

 

 

 

 

 

3: I treated her to a half hour midnight concert of yowling, growling and howling to remind her of what I’m capable of, while giving her dirty looks like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

None of these things have stopped her though.  However, I think I have come up with the perfect strategy to make her stop giving me medicine.  As soon as she does that again, I will put my paw down my throat and make myself throw up!  Then, she’ll think the medicine made me sick, so she’ll stop giving it to me.  Oh!  I see she has the syringe in her hand.  She is about to get a nasty surprise.  I will tell you what happened in a minute . . .

Continue reading

The Medicine Wars Part One

Hello, cats.  I’m here to report that my Mom has turned into a cat torturer.  Cats, she is squirting medicine down my throat.  Words cannot express how unhappy I am with what she’s doing.  Well actually they could, but this is a family blog.  All I will say is that I am doing everything I can to discourage her from her attempts to put any type of medicine in or on me. I am hiding under the bed.  I am spitting out the medicine she gives me when she’s not looking.  And, most importantly, I am plotting revenge so that she will never do this to me again!

I will post more about this topic later.  Right now, I am going to sharpen my claws so that I am ready for her next attempt to give me medicine.  Until then, if you have any ideas on how to stop her from doing this, please post.  Thanks!

The Vet Visit

Hello, cats.  I am going to tell you the story of yet another horrible visit to the person who that woman calls the veterinarian (vet), and I call the cat torturer, in words and pictures.  This whole nightmare started when Mom found out I had red bumps behind my ears that were bleeding.  So, she decided to take me to the vet.  Here I am right after she captured me:

 

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, I was not happy.  After this picture was taken, I had to endure two horrible things:  Mom’s driving, and her singing to me as she did that.  Yowwwl!  After that, we arrived at the vet’s office.  Here is a picture of me before that torturer came into the room:

 

 

 

 

 

 

What happened next was so horrible that I’ll just tell you about it.  That man squeezed the already sore spots behind my ears. That hurt!  Then he told Mom that he “strongly suspected a spider bite.”  After that, he gave Mom some medicine to give me.  Then, I was back in the carrier and had to endure yet another drive with Mom as she sang to me—again.  This is how I felt about that:

 

 

 

 

 

 

We finally arrived home, where I had another unpleasant surprise waiting for me.  Mom actually gave me the foul-tasting medicine that the vet gave her.  I plan on stopping that.  Until then, this picture shows exactly how I feel about this whole matter:

Angrily,

Grace who is going to get the vet and my Mom too!

Herb Has Been Found

Hello cats.  I’m sorry I didn’t post sooner about Trixie’s juicy gossip, but horrible events, including a vet visit made me too upset to write. I am feeling better now, and although I am plotting to get even with my Mom and the vet too, I can type.  Cats, you are not going to believe this but—we found Herb!

And, this gets better, cats.  Not only did we find Herb, but we saw him flirting with a cute female cat who lives a block away from us.  Now, in case you are new to my blog, Herb is the father of Mimi’s kittens.  He is also is the best-looking male cat in our neighborhood, and he knows it.  So, it did not surprise me that he was flirting with yet another girl-cat.  However, he’d better pray that Mimi doesn’t find out about this.  If she does, she will kill him!

When Herb knew he’d been spotted, he hid.  However, he knows that we know where he lives now.  So, it’s just a matter of time until one of us gets our claws on him.  Or, maybe we’ll just let Mimi do whatever she wants to him.   I can hardly wait to see what happens!

I’ve got to go for now, though.  I think Mom is getting out that horrible thing called “cat medicine,” so I have to take evasive action.  I will tell you all about the vet visit in my next post.  Type to you soon, cats!

Update on Mimi and Her Kittens

Hi cats.  I can’t believe that it’s been over a month since I talked about my secret friends.  I guess I got lazy or something.  And, watching out for Mimi and her kittens is a full-time job!  Here are a few of the things that I’m doing:

  • Dealing with that Mimi who drives me crazy 24/7
  • Preventing our neighbors from finding Mimi and her kittens by yowling, growling and acting crazy so they don’t hear the kittens mewing
  • Helping Mimi train her kittens to be safe around the sometimes crazy humans who live in our building
  • Teaching the kittens which humans are OK, and which are not and above all—
  • Trying to keep my Mom from figuring out that there are five cats living in a storage space that is one wall away from our apartment

These things are not easy to do.  I like protecting the kittens, though, so I’m happy to do them—for now.   Also, all of my secret friends are helping me, so I still get to sleep. And—

Oh!  Trixie is at the window.  She is my best friend and I can tell by the look on her face that she has some very juicy gossip to pass on.  I can hardly wait to hear it, so I’ve got to go.  I will tell all of you everything that she tells me in my next post.  Bye for now!

Mom Killed Our Coffee Table!

Hi cats.  I am sorry that I have taken so long to post a new entry to this blog.  I have been busy helping Mimi with her new kittens, sleeping and gossiping . . . errr . . . doing my usual activities, and keeping that Mom of mine under control.

Speaking of Mom, guess what she did?  She killed our coffee table with the evil vacuum cleaner.  It happened about a week ago.  While using that miserable machine, Mom bumped a leg of our coffee table which promptly fell off.  Mom thought it would be an easy repair, so she glued the leg back on like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

The table stood for a few days.  Then, for some reason known only to humans, she decided to vacuum again.  When Mom tried to move the coffee table again, the leg fell off and everything flew off of it, and crashed onto the rug.  I laughed so hard that I almost rolled out of the bed I was hiding under.   I’m glad she didn’t see me doing that.  Then, Mom found a unique way to support our table until she could find a new one.  This is what she did:

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know, this is pathetic.  Thankfully, Mom found another coffee table today so our house is back to normal again. I hope that killing the coffee table has cured her of her vacuuming habit forever.

That’s about it for now.  Mom is coming and I don’t want her to know that I posted pictures of the coffee table fiasco.  In my next post, I will update you on what’s going on with Mimi and her kittens.  I will also post about what’s going on in my neighborhood.  Until then, I hope all of you are doing great, and have your human/s under control!

What’s Really Going in this House on Thanksgiving!

Hello cats.  My Mom may have sounded nice in that Thanksgiving greeting that she just posted, but don’t let her fool you.  She’s mean!  Would you believe that she ignored me all day?  First, she got up at 6:00 A.M. and ran out of the house to meet some friends after giving me a scant ten minutes of play time.  Then, when she returned home, she was so busy doing laundry, dishes and taking out the garbage that she completely ignored me.  And now, she’s about to head out of the door again to go to something called a “Thanksgiving Dinner”.  I am not happy about this, cats!

So, she may find an unpleasant surprise or two when she comes home.  I can kick poop out of my litter box as well as any other cat. Then, I think I’ll shred those sweaters that she laid out to dry on the couch.  And then—

Oh no.  She’s heading toward the computer!  I’ve got to go so that she doesn’t know what I’m up to.  Bye for now, cats!

Later . . .

Well cats, I never got a chance to wreak havoc on this house because I fell asleep. I woke up when my Mom came home and said, “Gray-cie.  I have a surprise for you!”  I was excited about that.  I figured maybe she’d bought me a new cat cube, or brought home some salmon.  I was wrong.  This is what she gave me:

 

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, I was not thrilled with her surprise. However, I’ve decided to postpone my revenge because at least she tried to do something nice for me.  So I will sign off for now, cats.  I hope that all of you had a great Thanksgiving and got everything you wanted today.  Type to you soon.