Guess Who’s Helping Mimi to Have Her Kittens?

Hi cats.  Guess who got stuck helping Mimi have her kittens?  Me, that’s who.  So, I haven’t been able to post because I’ve been busy getting Mimi ready for the Big Day when she will become a mother.  I’m even letting her use the storage space by my apartment as the place where she will have them.

I know—I said that there was no way that I was going to do that in my last post.  After I posted, though, Mimi came to my window and said, “Grace, if you don’t help me, no one will.  And, I’m scared that I’ll do something wrong and hurt my kittens!”

I sighed.  Then I told her, “Mimi, God made you so that you know how to have kittens.  So, there is no way that you can ‘do something wrong and hurt your kittens’!”

“Oh yes I can,” she yowled back.

I knew that she was wrong, but I saw that she was scared and wouldn’t listen to me.  So, after letting out a deep yowl, I said, “Oh, all right.  I’ll help you.  I’ll even be your birth coach!”

Mimi was so happy when I said that that she jumped up on my window and tried to kiss me.  I dodged her, and hissed, “Mimi, you don’t have to kiss me.  And, I am telling you that I may have to help you a little, but when the time comes, you will know what to do.”

So, my time has been filled with baby-sitting Mimi, and talking to my friends in the neighborhood.  Also, as always, I’m keeping that Mom of mine in line.  I’ll talk to you more about that in my next—”

“GRACE!  HELP!  IT’S TIME FOR ME TO HAVE MY BABIES!”

Oh no, not again.  Let me go check on her . . .

<A little bit later . . .>

Errr—I have to go cats.  It really is time to for Mimi to have her kittens!  Pray for me, cats.  It’s going to be a long day—”

“GRACE! Quit typing on that blog of yours and come help me to have my kittens!”

Great! I’ve got a drama cat that’s giving birth on my claws.  Cats, please pray that I don’t kill her until after her kittens are born.  Thanks!

Blinds Are Made for Breaking!

Hello, everyone.  I just want to show you a recent altercation between me and my Mom in three pictures.  First here is a picture of our kitchen blinds after I’d spent weeks making them the way I like them:

 

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, they were perfect.  However, Mom has this crazy idea called “privacy”, so she was not happy about what I did to the blinds.  Thankfully, she thinks she broke them like this second picture shows before she could blame me for the shape that the blinds were in:

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, at least she thinks she broke them, and I am not about to tell her any differently.  So, she paid our landlord to install a new pair of blinds.  This third picture shows how she likes the blinds:

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know, this is boring.  I mean, how does she expect me to protect our home when I can’t see outside?  And, doesn’t she care that I can’t see what my friends are doing?  This is unfair.  So, I will re-adjust these blinds soon.  I’ve got to go, though.  She is walking toward the computer, and I don’t want her to know what I’ve been up to.  Type to you later, cats!

I’m Not Talking to Anyone!

Hi, cats.  I’ve got to let you know what’s going on.  I would have posted sooner, but that Mom of mine was hogging the computer!

In my last post, I had to go because Angelina was at the window.  So, I went to talk to her.  Well, all I can say is after the conversation we had, I’m not speaking to her or to any of those other cats who live outside of my window.  Here is what happened:

After I got to the window, I said, “Hi Angelina.  I’m so happy to see you.  You won’t believe this.  Mom said she won’t get me any more toys.  That is so unfai—”

“Shut up, Grace.  I am sick of your whining!  While you are worrying about your toys, the cats you say are your friends are freezing to death,” Angelina interrupted.

I was so shocked that Angelina told me to “shut up” that I actually shut up.

Angelina then said mean things to me.  She told me that I didn’t care about what happened to my friends.  She said I was selfish.  And, she finished her speech by saying, “Grace, you didn’t even look out of your window to see how your friends were doing.  You just stayed curled up in that pet bed that your Mom bought. You could have at least snuck some food out to them.  You didn’t think of that, though, did you?  Grace, you have forgotten where you came from!”

After Angelina said that, I was so mad that I jumped at the window and clawed at her.  She ducked, and then stalked away.  As she did that, she yelled, “I hope you’re happy being alone in your pet bed, because none of us are speaking to you right now!”

I was and am furious.  How dare Angelina say I forgot where I came from?  That’s not true.  I know it can be cold and scary out there.  However, I like my new life so much that I don’t want to think about that.  And, I don’t think my Mom would be happy if she came home and found twenty cats that I was trying to rescue living here.  So, I’m going to continue to enjoy my new life.  And, I think I’ll work really hard on this website.  Then, I’ll become a rich and famous cat.  That will show them!

OK, cats.  Now it’s your turn.  Has anyone ever said mean things to you?  If so, what did you do about that?  Please let me know.  I’m looking forward to hearing from you because I’m lonely so that I can get some ideas on what to do about that Angelina.  Thanks!

It’s Our First Anniversary!

Today is one year from the day that Mom adopted me from the shelter.  Mom calls this our Adoption Anniversary.  Now, I have to tell you that it did not start off well.  She told me “Happy Anniversary.” when she woke up but did I get any more attention than that?  Nope.  She rushed around the apartment, and then left me alone for over eight hours so that she could work.  All I could think was, This is a horrible anniversary!

I’m happy to say that that has changed.  When Mom finally got home, she smiled at me.  Then, she gave me three new toys.  I’m not sure if I like the big rat-like toy, but I do like my two new balls.  Best of all, she gave me my favorite chicken and salmon dinner.  So, I think I’ll keep her—for another day at least 🙂 I’ve got to go, though.  That chicken and salmon dinner is calling my name!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Humans Eat Tapeworms to Lose Weight!

Yes, cats you read that right.  Some humans deliberately eat tapeworms in order to lose weight.  They call this, “The Tapeworm Diet.”  I call it plain insanity!

I first found out about this when Mom told me about a Tyra Show that she watched in the break room at work.  There were two women on the show.  Both of them felt they weighed too much and decided to eat tapeworms so that they’d lose weight.  Tyra and the other people on the show showed them that people get these worms from cow poop (yuck!).  Then she showed how cows are force-fed the worms so that they’ll produce more.  Then, the cows are killed so that these worms can be harvested for human consumption.

Next, a doctor came out on the show and explained what will happen to the humans who eat tapeworms. He told the women that they were risking their lives if they choose to go on this “diet”  Then, he and the show’s producers, showed a gross picture of a big tapeworm to show how big it gets inside of people!  Would you believe that these tapeworms can live for twenty years, and grow (the ones that are in beef, anyway!) up to twelve feet long?!  And, the tapeworms can split up inside of their intestines and turn into little caterpillar-like things that can crawl out of their nether regions and go down their legs.  Worst of all, they can spread throughout the humans’ bodies, and can get into their lungs or liver.  They can even go into their brains and cause seizures or insanity.

I know . . . this is disgusting.   However, I wanted you cats to know the depth of some humans’ insanity.  Even my Mom said that she thought that diet was a good idea “for a minute.”  I am glad that she knows the truth now.  We’ll pray for those humans who don’t, and for the poor cows that are being slaughtered in the name of human weight loss.

Oh, and a word to the tapeworm harvesters.   I strongly suggest you don’t ever try this with me or any other cat.  If you do, we will claw your arms off!

 

Finally – a Chance to Blog!

Wow!  Mom has been so busy this week that I thought I’d never get a chance to blog. She was working long hours at work, so the computer was off and unplugged.  I hated that.  I didn’t have a chance to type anything.  That made me angry!  And, she was so busy running to and from work, washing her work clothes, and getting food to bring to work, that I thought that she’d forgotten about me. That scared me.  I even thought she might still be mad at me for clawing her.  So, I prayed, “God, what is going on here?!  My Mom is M.I.A.  Could you please tell why this is happening?!  It isn’t because I clawed her last week, is it?”

To my surprise I heard Him say, No, it’s not.  However, Grace, in order to understand this, you need to know about what she’s going through.”

Then, I got a picture in my head of Mom at work.  She was cashiering.  There were tons of people in line.  They kept coming at her—even when she needed a break.  A few of them were rude to her.  Some of the customers even stormed out of the store after they found out it was out of stock of what they wanted.   Even worse, one man even made her get him a heavy chair, put it back, and then decided that he didn’t want it after all.  That wasn’t fair!  So, I asked God, “God, why doesn’t she just claw them in the face?

He replied, Because then she’d go to jail.  Then where would you live?  And just in case you’re wondering why she’s working so much, here is a picture of her bank balance.

All I could say was, “Ohhhhh . . . I didn’t know it was like that.”  Then I shut up.  He is God after all!

After I saw what was going on, I supported her.  I was nice to her even though I felt ignored.  And, I noticed that she did take time to snuggle me and play with me even though she was exhausted.  I appreciated that.  I’m glad that things are back to normal, though.

I have to say that seeing what she goes through has made me very grateful that I am a cat.  I know that if I were human and had to do her job I’d either get fired or end up in jail.  So, I’m going to enjoy my privilege of being able to take catnaps whenever I want to and let her handle the bills.  I don’t need that kind of pressure in my life!

Momma and I Are Having a Good Day!

OK, cats.  I know that it is unusual for me to post about something good.  However, Mom and I are really having a good day.  She’s given me lots of belly rubs, and is making time to play with me.  Right now, I am brushing up against her leg for more attention while she’s working on my blog.  Oh wow . . .  she’s actually stopping what she’s doing and playing with me.  This is great!

There is only one thing that is bothering me.  She took down that torture device know as a cat carrier.  Could she be up to something?  I sure hope not!   If she is, though, I have many techniques to avoid being put into that miserable thing.  So, I’m not going to worry.  I’ve got to go, though.  I’m enjoying all of this love and attention.

Happily,

Grace